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The Soundtrack of My Life

bruce

I often hear a song and think “yes, this belongs in this soundtrack of my life” – so I figured it was time to start putting pen to paper on this and figuring out what the heck that actually meant.

When it comes to music, I am still a 15-year-old girl. I will play the hell out of a song and let it push through my soul a thousand times over. What can I say, I’m a masochist. I love a good gut-ripping song. Lately, there have been two – “Let Her Go” by Passenger and “Wake Me Up” by Avicii / Aloe Blacc. I like a little drama.

The first time I fell in “love” – wasn’t really love but my first real brush with its potential – it was the summer of “Red Red Wine” by UB 40 and “Groovy Kind of Love” by Phil Collins. While these songs didn’t crush my soul, whenever I hear them I’m 15 again and can remember every sight, sound, touch, and smell of that summer.

When my husband started dating, it was the holidays of 2005 and the first time (!) I heard Joni Mitchell’s “River.” Not sure how I got that far in life without hearing this gem, but it has never left me. I also got my first lesson in Tom Waits who is still a mainstay in our home.

But the first time I heard “Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol, the world stopped spinning. It captured every feeling I had about Ryan – my first and last big, real love. It was like that moment where life goes from black and white to color…

If I lay here, If I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we’re told, Before we get too old,  Show me a garden that’s bursting into life

The connection to that song was only made more perfect by its starring role in Ryan’s proposal to me (lake at Central Park, a surprise violinist, you get the idea). And the most amazing part? This song finds me during such moments of doubt and uncertainty and literally pulls me back in reminding me of the things that matter most.

A few others for the list would include:

  • “Angel in a Centerfold” by the J. Geils Band – the first time we forced my mom to drive us to the mall for a 45 record.
  • “Crucify” by Tori Amos – only one person knows the significance of this song and she has been sworn to secrecy.
  • “Because of You” by Kelly Clarkson – every guy that broke my heart knows why.

I would be remiss to talk about the soundtrack of my life without mentioning Springsteen. It started in seventh grade and has never stopped. No one has the heart and soul of Bruce. But what I love about his music most is that I share this passion with my other soul mate in life, my mom. It’s given us a lot of great memories over the years and endeared us to many fellow fans who have had no choice but to become lifelong friends. And the ride is still not over.

Things That I’m Obsessing Over Right Now:

  • The three unread issues of the New Yorker calling my name
  • The two books on my nightstand
  • My girl’s trip to NYC next weekend
  • Breaking Bad (Episode 7, Season 2, No Spoilers!)
  • The hot mess that my closet has become
  • My search for the best eye cream

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3 Comments Post a comment
  1. Fran LaSpada #

    This is the second time today that I have brought to tears. Tears of pride and thankfulness for the family I have been blessed with. I feel so honored to be your Mom and gratiful that you have decided to share your feelings and thoughts and dreams with others so they can know what I have always known – you are a special talent and a true gift. Love you always!

    November 8, 2013
  2. LOVE reading your blog. You have a wonderful way with words. I too love music & can’t imagine life without it. Many songs bring to mind memories both good & bad. I don’t have the gift of recall to name them like you do-something I regret & wish I’d kept a journal or even a log of favs over the years! Thanks for reminding me of one of the greatest pleasures of my life.

    November 8, 2013
  3. Sue Logar #

    I am reading this for the third time and am amazed at the rhythmical flow of your writing (which works well in a piece about music!). You have captured the essence of every 15 year old girl who is now an adult and how a simple song can immediately take you back to a moment and how one song can give you what you need to keep going. Love, love, love this. I hope you will write more.
    ❤ Sue

    November 8, 2013

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